Woe Betide: The Things I Do When I Can’t Sleep

The title is pretty self-explanatory. Up late, couldn’t sleep, subsequently decided to amuse myself by using online movie maker Xtranormal, which is similarly self explanatory. All you have to do is choose a set of characters, a background, and type things for them to say. For whatever reason, I decided to use the lyrics from Have A Nice Life‘s song Woe Unto Us (from the Time of Land EP) as the basis for a conversation between Einstein and Napolean, with…. Well, I’ll let you be the judge of the results. First, here’s the song in question.


Einstein’s script is the lyrics, Napolean’s script is whatever the hell I could think of at the time. Or, where I couldn’t think of anything myself, quotes, which I’ll attribute properly in a minute. You may also note that Einstein speaks with an American accent, while Napolean speaks with an English accent. The reason for that is rather practical – there are German and French accented voices on Xtranormal, but even when I typed in plain English, they made no sense at all.

The “care” quote is by a dude called Doc Childre, from a book called The How To Book of Teen Self Discovery. I altered it slightly because the voice couldn’t quite enunciate the words properly when left in the same sequence as the original, which is:

The more care you put into your life, the more life will care for you, bringing you fun adventures, great friends, and real inner security. Caring is just good street sense — So, Judge less and unstress, Care more and high score.

On a side note, where was this Doc Childre when I was a young, angry teenager? If somone had said that to me all those years ago, I woulda been like “whoah, this Doc totally gets me and is speaking my language – caring isn’t just cool, it’s street smart!” And that rhyming slogan at the end is just slick.

The other quote comes from Betrand Russell’s Philosophical Essays:

Brief and powerless is man’s life; on him and all his race the slow, sure doom falls pitiless and dark.

Which may have been heavy at four in the morning if I wasn’t busy fiddling with the timing of Einstein’s blank stare to the other quote and trying to figure out how to get Napolean to point at the trees and not the bench. o_0




About Satellite for Entropy

My thoughts are fish, all swimming about and prone to scattering swiftly. Some of them are pretty but not all of them are gold. Some have teeth; some travel in gangs and with a single school of thought; some are haphazard loners, darting about the place randomly and to no obvious purpose. But they're all slippery little suckers. Sometimes, I get lucky and find myself with a good grasp on one, long enough to remember what it looks like before releasing it back into the wild. View all posts by Satellite for Entropy

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